My intention, I thought, was to help. Recently I participated in volunteer meetings. As I listened and gave my opinion, I thought… don’t they realize I can help with that? Sheesh, I thought they’d be grateful for my expertise.
By the end of the meeting, I knew I was out of whack. I felt rejected and annoyed. I wondered how I had gotten myself into this mess.
The good news is that I recognize when I feel frustrated and insulted that there is something wrong with my thinking, not someone else. I had gone into the meeting thinking of doing it one way, instead of asking what needed to be done. My focus was on what I wanted to do, what my ego wanted to do, instead of how I could be of service. (Wayne Dyer‘s The Shift is a great movie on this topic.)
For you trainers and facilitators, you know it can happen to us easily as well. Facilitators need to stay focused on the learners. If class time becomes all about us as trainers ~ how funny we are or how much we know, our egos have entered the picture. Yet we can only help people learn when we focus on their needs ~ whether the topic is leadership, software, or health and safety training.
I am really looking forward to the next meeting, where I have every intention of asking how I can help? What do you need? And following through.
Gee, you know life is a lot less stressful when life is about service and kindness rather than our egos and need to be recognized. What situation at home or work can you change by changing your thoughts and focusing on serving others?